We're only as happy as everyone else seems to be...

I feel so happy lately. With my place in life, myself, and all the people around me. It's been a while since I felt so good about things. I think it's b/c I'm finally away from MIT. hahaha. But it's soooo refreshingly fantastic.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007 in a blur

So much has changed this year. For once, I can look back and smile at the year. It's been a ridiculously fabulous year. But the biggest thing that I've learned is to trust my instincts again. I had to make big decisions involving health, jobs, boys, and family in this year. But they were the "right" choices - even if some of them were emotionally charged.

Travelling Journey of 2007:
- China in January. I went back to my hometown, explored Shanghai, and spent some time with dear ole mama.
- Washington DC in March. Flew out for my interviews. I was hired by Orbital, and I'm so happy at my little job right now.
- Cancun in March! I love love love my sorority sistah sso much. I baked until I looked like black Aunt Jemima, and then I got cornrows in my hair. Miss my girls so bad!
- Boston in June - I graduated in so many different ways. I left my classmates. I left the MIT experience behind me, knowing that I have gotten stronger from those four years. I left my friends, my confidantes. I left this magical place where you have no limitations and all the opportunities shine in your face. I left someone I really cared about - and still kick myself that I didn't see it happening earlier.
- Lancaster for CTY in June. CTY was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I can't believe that my parents never sent me to summer nerd camp. Love the North Schnader Duckies!!! and my other RAs!!
- California visits in the late summer. San Francisco, San Jose, Palo Alto, Los Angeles, Santa Barbara, Santa Monica, Irvine...I feel like I've seen the entire state, all with really good company by my side. Yay I miss that state.
- Canada in October. Orbital took me for a critical design review with our feedhorn manufacteurs in Canadajavascript:void(0)
Publish Post. Woohoo! My first business trip! I'm official now.
- Boston in November. Man, I miss my college friends so much. We are all so scattered these days that it is hard to keep up. Everyone seems to be moving onward with their lives and personal goals, whether that is professional or personal. I loved hanging out with my sistahs for Camp Part Dos though.
- NYC for Thanksgiving. It was so amazing to see Jia, Jeanna, Jhan, and all my other finance people whose names don't start with a J. It's a real contrast to my current life, but I realize that I am much happier with my life than what would have been Hanhan at Blackrock. I love Jia so much, and I want her in my life forever.
- Home for the Holidays, then DC. My parents are reaching a point of okayness with my job. They told me that they were "proud" of me for the first time since I got my finance offer. More importantly, I'm finally settling in here, months and months later....finally.

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays

I'm home in Wexford right now. Yeah, Pittsburgh is such quaint little city. Two lane highways, and everyone is just so hometown friendly! I'll probably head back to DC on the 28th. Ray, you should come visit!! Should I go to New York for New Years? All of my friends seem to be in NYC, so maybe I need to go where the party is.

I want to fly soo badly. Since moving to DC, I no longer have to fly home. I might start buying plane tickets from Baltimore to Pittsburgh just so that I can get on an airplane. They're super ass cheap, so why now?

Places I want to go in 2008:
- Seattle
- Death Valley
- Chine with my daddy in October! Plus Hong Kong, Shengzhen, Nanjing, and Szechuan
- Beach!!!
- Atlantic City
- College football game at PSU or Michigan

It's gonna be good.

I've got a got a gota pocket full of sunshine....

First things first. I can't wait til the new Natasha Bedingfield CD comes out on Jan 22nd. I heard this song called "Pocket Full of Sunshine" on The Hills and I NEED the full version. Also, I DLed some Remy Zero and The Album Leaf. So happy with my music lately.

It's been interesting trying to look-out for judgments recently. I'm working on returning to my pre-MIT days, where I was generally more open minded about the things and people around me. I had an inquisitive nature that seems quelled. Where did you go, spirit? Anyways, I'm making headway in that I notice when my judgments begin now, and then I try to rephrase my mental thought immediately. Also, I've been working hard on asking questions about people's lives in order to understand their motivations more. MIT changed me a lot, but not necessarily all for the better. I think it made me into a workaholic + alcoholic, but the Institute really skews your perception of rank and reality.

For example, I think MIT students enter the real world and have difficulty respecting those who are not math/science inclined. They believe that the ability to solve math equations ranks you into the elite, but if you can write ridiculous essays, you'll still never be as respected. I think that's bullshit, and I always have. I LOVE the fact that my friends are comprised of engineering, finance people, as well as all else. Intelligence comes in many forms. I love hanging out with my finance kiddos because they are socially adept and understanding of people's mannerisms. That MIT mentality, which maybe I subscribed to at one point, is not something I want to perpetuate these days. Turning over a new leaf here in my new city.

I want to be the old Hanhan again. Maybe she was a much more naive version of today, but she sure smiled a whole lot more. And she could get to know people more easily because she approached her days with an open mind. I miss her.

I miss so much right now... in every part of my life, I think.